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Tyler K.

Divine Charity or Foul Grooming?


The Monks of the Most Blessed Virgin Mary of Mount Carmel are completely normal men. They laugh, they have good days and tough days, they make mistakes, and they need to eat and exercise. Living with religious brings unexpected experiences. You see them in all their humanity. St. Therese in her autobiography even mentions that she had an eye-opening experience when she was in close contact with priests on her pilgrimage to Rome. It is true – when living with someone, you see them as they really are. One thing sets these monks apart: a superabundance of divine charity, not to mention all the virtues that flow from it.


These monks, specifically the leadership in the monastery, have recently been accused on the news website Church Militant of cultivating homosexuality in their community by grooming, or emotional manipulation. Their main informer was a postulant and a member of the community for one month. As a former novice of this community, I never experienced anything of the kind. I was there almost a year-and-a-half. Let me explain…


The monks live fraternal charity in a very real and fervent way. St. Teresa of Avila says in the third chapter of the Interior Castle that fraternal charity is required to reach the heights of prayer, the transforming union. More fundamentally, it is required by the Lord Jesus in the Gospel. In living this virtue, the monks make use of a moderate amount of affection. As we are composite beings – body and soul – we need to use bodily affection in the spiritual life to attain to a more pure, spiritual love. In elevating this love to a supernatural level, the monks take the Holy Family at Nazareth as their model. In fact, fraternal embraces are even prescribed in their ancient Carmelite liturgy outside of Mass. In contrast with large, institutional Benedictine monasteries, these Carmelite monks envision their community as a true family. This is after the example of St. Teresa, who wished to keep her convents small when she was reforming the Carmelite order in the 1500s.


In my opinion, it is this family atmosphere that jarred the ex-postulant into accusing these Carmelites of homosexual grooming. Could I be wrong? Maybe so. But I do not see how there could be anything else that would cause him to think this way. After living among these Carmelites for so long, I have found that their fraternal affection and charity is truly helpful spiritually.


The way the monks have been trashed out by Church Militant is saddening to me, and I wish I would have took the time to get this message out there sooner. My time with the Monks of the Most Blessed Virgin Mary of Mount Carmel was full of growth on every level and even enjoyable. I hope many young men will discern their vocations there to build up Our Lady’s order.


I will take away the stony heart out of their flesh, and will give them a heart of flesh: That they may walk in my commandments.” (Ezekiel 11:19-20, Douay-Rheims Bible)


In Jesus, Mary and Joseph,


Tyler K.


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